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Weekly Psychotherapy Sessions.

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Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate.

Carl Jung

Self-Actualization

After a life-changing awakening of consciousness in 2006, I developed an approach to self-actualization that integrates the spiritual and psychological dimensions.

 

I view the self of each person as being unique and individual while also connected to the transcendent. Our work is not to lose the self as new-age or eastern teachings imply: It is to clarify and actualize the conscious light and love that we are. 

Awakening Consciousness

The process centers on living from conscious presence - the place of inner observing where we can be in the world, but not of it; where we engage in our psychology while also transcending it.

 

Living from conscious presence allows the loving light, stillness, vitality and wholeness of our essential self to transform us from the inside out. I show people how to deepen their presence in a simple, practical way over time.

Intuitive Guidance

My way of working with people is dynamic and engaging. I act as an intuitive catalyst for transformation. I am here to inspire and uplift your vision of what Life really is or can be.

 

Whether working with a group or person, we will easily shift between the meditative, relational and physical aspects of Life that call us to fuller consciousness. 

Vauxhall Station on a murky November Saturday evening is not the setting one would choose for a revelation of God! The third-class compartment was full. I cannot remember any particular thought processes which may have led up to the great moment.

For a few seconds only (I suppose) the whole compartment was filled with light. I felt caught up into some tremendous sense of being within a loving, triumphant and shining purpose. I never felt more humble. I never felt more exalted. A most curious, but overwhelming, sense possessed me and filled me with ecstasy.

I felt that all was well for mankind. All men were shining and glorious beings who in the end would enter incredible joy. Beauty, music, joy, love immeasurable and a glory unspeakable, all this they would inherit.

My Faith

I believe we are divine beings who have eternal life. I believe in God's grace and infinite love. I believe in God's angels and helpers who are always near. I believe life is mainly about learning to give and receive love. We must also learn to be happy, courageous and contented.

 

I believe we learn and grow spiritually through the vehicle of our personality structure and psyche. There is a spirit of wisdom and truth within us, while the intellect wanders in complexity and delusion. I believe most of our learning happens in relationships with those we care about and open up to. We cannot grow through doubt, pessimism or cynicism. We grow in the light of optimism, empathy and encouragement. Physical difficulties are here for spiritual growth. Life and love are eternal, and death is only the limit of our sight. God is. I am. We are one, even in our uniqueness. We shall eventually know all that is, in eternal life together.

Embracing Stillness
Stillness is one of the most powerful vehicles for becoming conscious. Stillness has an outer meaning and an inner meaning. Outwardly it means taking time for reflection and meditation, and refraining from useless words or distractions. Inwardly, stillness is the atmosphere of our essential consciousness. It is the energy of real love and presence. The inner voice can be heard in stillness. The voice of our real self communicates through the deep feeling, intuition and symbolism. 

If you are ready to transform your life, then it's time to slow down and be still. Stillness is the atmosphere of our essential consciousness.In stillness, we experience our deepest self as the inner observer. As we learn to observe and relax in stillness, we find the stillness of our being is also love. It is truthfulness. It is understanding. And it is beauty.To know truth and to open again and again to deep love, we must be still.In stillness the heart is restored to self-honesty and innocence.Stillness bridges the ordinary and the sacred, the human and divine dimensions in us. When we are attuned to this conscious stillness, we continue to live an ordinary life. And yet, as we are transformed, our outer lives may also change in wonderful ways. We will find the clarity and courage to let go of what no longer works for us. And we will find the passion and enthusiasm to fulfill our highest purpose. What I want to share with you is a path of slow spirituality. If you want to get enlightened quick, you are more likely to end up deluded and fragmented away from your human heart and natural being.This path of gentle self-reflection is sure to steadily enlighten you, without alienating you from your authentic humanity and heart, because it is walked on the ground of your own life. This path of conscious self-development is refreshingly simple, soulful and easy to practice. There is no special method or set of teachings to accept. There is simply your process of coming to know and feel yourself in the light of your real self. Most of all this a path of love, patience and natural wholeness. Here we begin humble, keeping our feet on the ground of practical action and our hearts open to the human experience in all its tragedy and triumph. Here we find the God of small things and slow change. We do not look for something big. We listen and wait. We take action and rest. This is the way of slow spirituality.

Throughout my life I've been drawn toward self-knowledge and spirituality. Driven by a passionate urge to develop myself and understand the human condition, I have engaged deeply in travel, literature, music and psychospiritual studies.

During my university years I studied in Amsterdam, the Netherlands. This experience reconnected me with my Dutch ancestors and extended family. Today I visit the Netherlands at least once per year to give spiritual seminars, practice the language and meet with friends. 

While at college I also interned at a foreign policy thinktank in Washington DC. After graduating, I lived and worked for London. While working as an editor at National Geographic, I discovered the work of Carl Jung and found my calling as a depth psychologist. 

My doctoral training included spiritual studies, and I found myself increasingly drawn toward classical mysticism. In 2006, after many years of practicing conscious presence, I experienced a life-changing shift of consciousness. This brought unprecedented peace of mind, inner silence, energetic opening, and intuitive insight. I describe this shift in detail in my book, The Art of Freedom: A Guide to Awakening.


My spiritual paradigm departs from the more common, eastern approaches, although I have learned much from them. I do not believe our spiritual development is mainly about losing the individual self, or that the ultimate nature of reality is merely an impersonal background of awareness. Based upon my own inner experience and also my extensive study of Near-Death Experiences, I believe we belong to an eternal world of spirit and a divine Source or God. 

I believe that our real spiritual goal is to actualize our soul's love, wisdom, creativity and joy through the often challenging material play of Life, with our fellow imperfect beings. Once we have actualized our conscious nature, our psyche becomes more integrated and our personality expresses higher qualities. 

My life is devoted to helping people navigate this sacred inner process. 

 

The first movement of the conscious life is to patiently observe our mind and become present in every moment. Then, Life will show us everything we need to see in order to grow.

This is why having an experienced guide and mentor is so valuable. Life has a way of surprising and overwhelming even those who are well rooted in love and awareness. We all need help at times to hear the voice of truth within, and to see situations from a higher view.  

Self-actualization refers to the process of fulfilling one's unique psychological and spiritual nature, such that one becomes a deeply conscious, authentic and empowered being.

 

At first, our innate urge toward self-actualization usually arises as a desire for emotional healing and better functioning in life. Yet, we will inevitably find that the search for psychological wellness is always intimately connected with our spiritual need for higher consciousness, meaning and joy.

 

In a sense, there is no painful symptom and negative habit we struggle with that is not intimately connected with our need to learn Love -- love, not as a principle that points only away from oneself toward others, but as a state of being and beatitude that encompasses the divine soul in us and all things. Therefore I see no real division between the work of psychological healing and spiritual illumination. The differences only pertain to different individuals' readiness to contemplate the deeper matters of the spirit, and to explore aspects of inner experience that are very subtle and difficult to describe. While one person has meditated and reached some degree of luminous clarity or heart opening, another struggles with a painful habit which reflects the lack, and the longing for, that kind of experience. 

Therefore, a large part of healing comes from uplifting one's paradigm of self and life to a more conscious, open and essential vision.

JUNG attains to the numinous 

I often find that people are neglecting some very fundamental keys to their transformation. Often, they have settled for rather pessimistic and soulless views about love and life -- and so their attempts to find peace are thwarted. Alternatively, they study and try to understand highly abstract teachings that do not even begin to address the very significant immaturities or existential blindspots they carry.  

My approach is energetic and goes to the heart of the matter. Our consciousness is inextricably linked with our life energy, emotions and thoughts.

 

Before there can be any profound illumination of consciousness or opening to divine love, we must awaken a courageous and inspired attitude toward life. We must have skin in the game and seek to make our lives a reflection of divine beauty, love and intelligence. I work energetically and intuitively with people to both confront them with what they are avoiding in themselves, and to inspire them toward a higher vision. 

You say that you went through a spiritual awakening. Most people who talk about awakening are coming from an eastern form of spirituality.

Although my spiritual journey was strongly influenced by the East, my psychological practice and spiritual views are closer to western spiritualism. First, I do not regard our mind, thoughts or sense of self as "illusion." I do not believe that absolute truth or reality is impersonal consciousness. I believe rather that we wrongly identify with a false, disempowered self that seeks love and happiness through self-defeating and illusory activities. Meanwhile our deepest and most real self is made of divine love and the eternal, conscious intelligence of the soul. 

Life is a process of moving from a relatively unconscious mode of being, to a broader and fuller consciousness of who and what we are. Becoming conscious involves everything from practical life issues and relationships, to the more sublime and ineffable dimension of the spirit.  

I emphasize that real healing, empowerment and higher consciousness arise from the direct experience of psychological insight and self-awareness. Understanding ourselves. With understanding, comes love. Expansion. Awakening.

Through this experience of becoming conscious, we manifest our most authentic self -- while also knowing our conscious nature as divine and transcendent.

 

My focus is on meeting people where they are and working intimately with them on their real-life struggles and relationships. Certain spiritual teachings help guide the process, but when and how I convey those to a person depends greatly on their readiness and personality. 

 

In very wonderful ways, we find that working with the ordinary reveals the extraordinary. The great surprise is that transcendence comes from bringing conscious light to the seemingly mundane aspects of life, where pain has been ignored and therefore passion, creativity and joy are also stifled.

 

All manner of personal issues are in fact the real gateway to spiritual wholeness that many people ignore, as they use intellectual doctrines, tips and tricks to try to bypass the mind or emotions.

 

To find peace, we must first suffer consciously, passionately, with tears as well as laughter. Laughter is the most divine thing, after all. When we have consciously suffered, searched and found new vision within, then comes new life, a new Heaven and Earth. 


If you would like to explore this integrative way of self-actualization, I welcome you to get in touch with me.

The starting point of my work is that we each have a psyche (and personality) through which we experience life and through which we grow spiritually. I do not affirm any eastern or new-age doctrine which says that we have no self; that we do not creatively shape our own thoughts; or that "the mind" or "ego" is the problem. 



When our personality is 
 

Self-actualization refers to the process of fulfilling one's unique psychological and spiritual nature, such that one becomes a deeply conscious, authentic and empowered being. At first, our innate urge toward self-actualization usually arises as a desire for emotional healing and better functioning in life. Yet, the search for psychological wellness is always intimately connected with our spiritual need for higher consciousness and meaning. 

 

In fact, a large part of healing comes from uplifting one's paradigm of self and life to a more conscious, open and essential vision. I often find that people are neglecting some very fundamental keys to their transformation. Often, they have settled for rather pessimistic and soulless views about love and life -- and so their attempts to find peace are thwarted. They study and try to understand highly abstract teachings that do not even begin to address the very significant immaturities or existential blindspots they carry.  

My approach is energetic and goes to the heart of the matter. Our consciousness is inextricably linked with our life energy, emotions and thoughts.

 

Before there can be any profound illumination of consciousness or opening to divine love, we must awaken a courageous and inspired attitude toward life. We must have skin in the game and seek to make our lives a reflection of divine beauty, love and intelligence. I work energetically and intuitively with people to both confront them with what they are avoiding in themselves, and to inspire them toward a higher vision. 

You say that you went through a spiritual awakening. Most people who talk about awakening are coming from an eastern form of spirituality.

Although my spiritual journey was strongly influenced by the East, my psychological practice and spiritual views are closer to western spiritualism. First, I do not regard our mind, thoughts or sense of self as "illusion." I do not believe that absolute truth or reality is impersonal consciousness. I believe rather that we wrongly identify with a false, disempowered self that seeks love and happiness through self-defeating and illusory activities. Meanwhile our deepest and most real self is made of divine love and the eternal, conscious intelligence of the soul. 

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